i bit the bullet. i bought a mac. i decided that for once in my life, i wasn't going to wait until i got totally owned before i fixed a problem. i was haunted by images of my computer crashing while i wrote my paper, and my losing everything and being really crazy and out of my mind as i scrambled to write it again. that's what happened my first year (about three months after i'd bought the computer), and all the detailed, first-quarter-at-college book notes i'd taken to help me during finals were locked, inaccessible, in my computer's hard drive at best buy for three weeks, and i wasn't able to use them for my tests.
i'm not sure i'll ever be over the sticker-shock guilt of buying something so expensive. it wasn't outrageously expensive by any means (i made sure of that), but it was new-laptop expensive, and i'm the kind of girl who goes straight to the sale racks in clothing stores because god forbid i have to pay full price for a t-shirt. i hate monies. it stresses me out to have to think about it. and that's not to say that i'm way flippant and that money is no object to me and that i love spending it willy-nilly (yes, willy-nilly). what i mean is that i wish it didn't exist in the first place and that i didn't have to worry about how i was going to pay my rent and get a working computer and have a part-time job that doesn't pay a million dollars an hour. i have this fear that i'm never going to eat/go out/buy orbit ever again.
what a sad life that would be.
No comments:
Post a Comment