giggles

some really interesting things have been happening to me in the last few days, and what just occurred is the crowning achievement: i was myspace-stalking an ex-boyfriend, found tons of pictures of him and his new girlfriend, and was giddy about how cute they looked together. i think i might have even giggled about how cool it is that they have each other. either i've suddenly matured ten years or the drugs i'm on are having an unexpected side effect on me. accutane is loosely associated with depression and terrible moods, but during these first two weeks of medication, i've felt the exact opposite - i've been a big bubbly happytown. i told my mom about it last night, and even just talking about how happy i've been made me break out in a fat smile and jump around. i'm not usually an unhappy person, but most of the time, i could do without seeing former boyfriends frolic around with their new girlfriends.

maybe it has to do with the fact that i feel like my life is coming together. i understand that sounds ridiculous and dramatic, but i really do feel as if pretty soon, everything's going to make sense. i'm happy with school and my friends and myself (or, at least, i'm pretty sure i'm on the way to self-acceptance).

let's see how long this giddiness lasts when i go to rehearsal. i'm sure something outrageous will happen there. i once witnessed an older woman in a corseted costume chasing me, battery-powered lantern in hand, up a flight of concrete stairs, only to see her lose her balance and tumble back down the steps, lantern flying. that's pretty outrageous, and may be hard to top, but i'll try.