sidewalk monster

i am a crazy fast walker. i have absolutely no idea how to pace myself, so i always end up sprinting around westwood to get to the various places i need to be, often arriving at work really early (which, i guess, isn't so terrible). what is terrible, however, is getting trapped behind slow people, who have no problem pacing themselves. i think i've discussed the wonder that is the slow walker who can take up an entire sidewalk by himself. he is unpredictable and therefore leaves those behind him unable to pass him, as he may, at any time, decide to veer directly into their paths. i encountered a small old woman wearing too-short polyester pants the other day, and she was, by far, the best (or worst) sidewalk monster in the world. she knew exactly where i tried to get around her, every single time, and totally preempted me, literally stepping out to stonewall me. maybe she had mirrors in her giant sunglasses, allowing her to see exactly where i was all the time. i should have been seriously irritated, but it was so amazing that i was actually kind of entertained.